I struggle with how to write about spirituality and God because I want there to be access for you, the reader, and at the same time the presence of my own self and experiences, I like God, the concept, the possibility, the actuality, the beauty and the terror. I believe simply that God is All. This pen I write with, this paper, my fleshed hand, the desk, the air I’m breathing, the radio, the sound---all of it is God. Every substance seen and unseen I know is infused with what we call God.
Now what God is, that’s beyond my ken. I don’t know. I embrace the not knowing though. Too many people believe they know when in fact I think its ultimately too immense to know. And yes, I’ve always had to deal with the fact that for God to be all then God is both “good” and evil” to my human moral perspective. What I think of this contradiction is that human morality, which we need for some level of order and safety, can’t abide or include all of that immensity Again, I arrive at I don’t know the mechanics of God.
This also brings up that God isn’t simply an entity to discourse with as I do humans because of that immensity.
So what am I then praying to?
God-Energy-Spirit within me?
God in the sky, stars and heavens above?
An all-permeating energy that can be directed by human’s through intentionalized will power?
I am a man-spirit on the deck of a star-ship looking out at a solar system and because my ship (this physical body) is finite, I l have to make choices about what to focus on. So I reduce my understanding of God to the smallest denominator that occurs with every breath and step as a human being, the energy, the kinetic, and the constant flux that is change.
God is change.
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