Thursday, September 28, 2017

Kyle Phoenix Answers: Was the yoga retreat in the TV show The Affair in Montauk or Upstate NY?

Systems Integrationist, writer, teacher, entrepreneur

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Thursday, September 21, 2017

Kyle Phoenix Answers: What type of gay bottoms do gay tops like?

Kyle Phoenix Answers: 

What type of gay bottoms do gay tops like?

Thursday, September 7, 2017

Kyle Phoenix: Would you go "gay for the stay" if you were sent to prison?

Kyle Phoenix:
Would you go "gay for the stay" if you were sent to prison?

It seems like based on male to male sex, being of an agreeable sexuality to desire from you to so many men would be comfortable. It's not.

From personal experience I can tell you sexuality, like most everything else in jail is both a weapon and a weakness.

As a weapon it exists as a way of controlling, manipulating and seducing men who are bereft of sexual, romantic attention. Whether more masculine or feminine, a sexuality that includes men allowed me to be more attuned, comfortable and attentive to the men. It drew titillated attention and questions from inmates and guards but in the confined space, suddenly its like being a woman there.

The weakness is that you get sexualized in the environment by literally fifty to seventy men in your pod. Say half don't care and another ten don't want to reveal titillated attention, that leaves 25 men who are attentive to you. That attentiveness isn't always healthy. One, 90% are committed criminals, so they aren't mentally stable, moralled humans by external society standards. This means sex is either transactional , possessive in a controlling fashion or exploitable by others.

Those 25 men then begin to both vie for and are malicious towards competitors, so favoritism becomes a problem. Who is it best to choose? Are they good enough, advantageous enough? Cute isn't going into that factoring. Are they strong enough to keep you and how do you gently but firmly rebuff continued advances? And you have to choose or maintain not choosing. Which means you have to spread your attention to the 25, continuously. It seems like a fantasy but your time In is now built into this workload of an unstable populace.

Issues arose from whom I played chess with, who I walked around the pod with, who gave me soda and chips, whom I helped write letters, who liked to watch me shower (the showers were open in the middle of the two tier pod and one of the few places you could be alone, in safe guard room view but it meant interested guards and prisoners could stand and watch you shower....and they did. One guard regularly took me from my cell to shower in front of him then when I was transferred to the pod, he would visit me. Guard attention, not a good thing amongst prisoners.)

Gay fantasy conviction is that its an abundance of your favorite ice cream, in fact its like being the only woman on a ship or island of men....and they all know you're a woman under your bland jumpsuit. With a stretch of time ahead of them, suddenly you, who supposedly are sexually amenable dont look half bad for a blowjob, forced, with all your teeth or maybe better without. Condoms aren't passed out so you're definitely getting HIV/AIDS.

Sexual mores takes on lower level thinking, like a bitch to be passed around a biker gang. The question isn't if you want that but rather who will get the,first shots off of you. Your sexuality is reduced to the lowest common usage so you either occupy it fully in the segregated pod, which is full of lgbtq....criminals, guaranteeing your one advantage is neutralized or you go into a Gen population. I chose Gen pop because it gave me greater confusion/advantages for the few weeks I was there. Also I figured that in gp more men would have trepidatious feelings even if interest was apparent and that hesitation would buy me time not to have to do anything.

Were there attractive men there?

Hell, yes.

PHDs. Pumped, Handsome, Delicious.

Did they make moves on me? Yes, several did. One drew a portrait of me, another vowed to protect me, I was given extra commissary treats at request, I was comforted excessively for being young and my first time there for a misdemeanor that became a violation, I was treated as a prize, or like a pig being fattened up for the slaughter. In that maelstrom I had to hide whom I found attractive. My leering shower guard was attractive and"nice" but rationally the power dynamic was out of whack. If you touch a guard, its a crime, assault. So say we did something and he didn't like it, we got caught or our affair soured, I could be open to his whim of an assault charge. Another guard had a reputation and three open cases against him for sexual impropriety with inmates, the others warned me about him. So I had a fully functioning"shark" to worry about as well and dodge but at the same time be compliant to the general directives of.

Does it sound exhausting yet?
It was.

Plus the emotional trauma of just jail itself and I was fighting to stay alert to the strands of this complex web.
How complex?

An inmate, ten feet away from the guard booth asked me to pass his razor in with mine. I was in line and did so. The guard went off on me because of what that could imply. Sure enough I turn and the inmate is watching the exchange, leering, hungrily. If the guard hadn't trumped the inmate, I would've been declaring myself "his".

Another time an inmate on his way to an appointment asked me to put his stuff in the dryer when his turn came up. Admonished again when I did it. Favors imply relationship.

Inmates began talking jealously about the inmate I walked the pod In circles with because he was handsome. So we had to change our routine, at the same time I had to consider his motivation as he was a professional gigolo, who did want my number for friendship outside of jail. Which I had to play off.

Constant complexity.

Fucking is more of a problem than relief, it was literally Dangerous Liaisons in orange jumpsuits.

Role play instead in your home because unless you bitch option in, it's of no pleasure and then of course you have to deal with a man, in jail, his manshit, he's a criminal and he's maybe situationally same gender screwing, so the contact comes with all kinds of caveats of no touch before 6pm, fetching for him, servicing him, losing weight, femming it up, odd sexual acts that only a fool in prison could create with peanut butter and jelly and too much damn free time to order around his new, vulnerable sex toy; he might even pimp you out.

The fantasy only works inside of titillated gay men's never been there fantasies. Kind of like their Black man, Latino man domination fantasies.....a whole other bullshit fantasy fetish.

Woe upon you if you're straight and sleight like Prince, if you're with segregated criminals or not, be ready for that train to be pulled on you.