Yes, I do.
I don’t know why men do it. Their pic, other men’s pics, random dick pics. The new trend is also ass pics, asshole pics, anus pics.
Here’s where I professionally think it stems from: heterosexual men get to “talk” about their sexuality constantly. Their appreciation, attraction and interest in women. Men who are not heterosexual, generally don’t. So they, when in the company or communication of another non-hetero man think he must feel the same pent up frustration as they do and want to share in this.
I don’t.
No, really I don’t.
I’m polite because I think it’s sad. Like a woman with a tilted wig that is clearly not her own hair. or a woman with a ginormous weave. Or a man in a cheap suit. or a man with bad teeth. I know that it would be rude to correct them because this is the narrow range of their life—-they assume everyone is living, leading, thinking, operating from their sexuality 24/7/395 days a year AND wants to only communicate about it when communicating with them.
Men don’t realize that I’m not a unicorn in this. Plenty of men and women who are non-hetero don’t want to be chained to their sexuality as identity or only perceived and treated through that lens.
It’s like if I said Good Morning to you and you said I saw an article with Don Cheadle yesterday. And I said Ok. And you said I really liked that movie with Samuel L. Jackson I saw last week. And I said ok. And you said you think Martin Luther King was a great guy. And I said ok. And you said that Trayvon Martin’s trial was a miscarriage of justice. And I said ok. And you said Popeye’s opens at 11am nine miles away. And I said ok. And you said there’s a guy in Accounting who looks just like Spike Lee. And I said ok. And you said Pearl Bailey could sing. And I say ok. And you just started screaming BLACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And I asked were you ok?
And you were like I was just trying to relate to you because BLACK is the only thing you and your brown skin must be thinking about and want to hear about and understand and know about and can see reality through and then you screamed BLACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK! again.
And I was like wow.
And then YOU called ME weird.
Here’s the rub of it——unless we’re flirting to fuck (or bluntly, fucking.) You don’t need to do it. If I don’t respond in kind, don’t resend more—-it’s probably fallen upon deaf interest as to MY feelings in the exchange.
Because of my professional and business ownership expanse (I couldn’t figure out a better word) I represent several institutions, agencies and my own company. I watch regularly how people are castigated, maligned, put out of business, de-considered for a range of professional positions, referrals, networking opportunities, and relationships (personal and professional) because they don’t understand Net Decorum.
I pride myself on reasonably good manners—-yes, in person I can be ribald, even profane, but that’s with time and consensual permission—-I however am always considering that what if this email exchange gets out what will other parties think not of your behavior and material sent but of MINE?
One of the laws of power is to guard your reputation fiercely.
I act accordingly and do.
I often tell perturbed men who request naked pics from me that you can scour the internet—-I’ve made an effort to control my pictorial presence in the past couple of decades and you’ll never find a naked one—-the closest I think is me with a sleeveless t-shirt at a pool table leaning over to take a short, therefore you can see into the shirt my chest; and a picture of me waving to my mother from the Bahamas ocean as she was parasailing—-I was wearing a Speedo and 20 years old.
I tell men I, who have held a minor political position, might want to run for Senate or Congress or Dog Catcher one day and I’ll be able to answer that certain behavior is not me (pictorially). Not from prudishness (I am the Samantha) but from decorum.
There’s a difference between a libertine and a slut.