Thursday, August 16, 2018

Kyle Phoenix Answers: How do you explain why the admiration of divas is common among gay males?

Divas tend to be popular, centers of attention, witty, appreciated AND the focus of sexual attention from men.
Most MSM move through life with a choice---come out or not, be out or not. Not being out gives a balancing act of identity power and weakness. One gets to affinity with manhood, with masculine power and be a Man. Or one can be out and get demoted from Man to Male (cocksucker, fucked in the butt) a state of non-Manhood, legally, morally and socially lacking in trust, fidelity, strength and even lesser patriarchal power. Depending on the situation, nearly as bad as being a .....woman, female.
But the Diva is a Woman. A female who has transcended her original oppressive state and commands attention and most important in a patriarchal society, the desirous attention of Men.
See, gay, bi, etc males while available to other males are not guaranteed males. Patriarchy in its arrogant blindness, half assures, creates the delusion within men that all women are available, rejectable or out of bounds to his penis (elderly women and children under 12). Note the option to reject lies in the delusional perspective of the man.
Now imagine you're raised in patriarchy as a male and therefore either closeted to maintain manhood social power or out and demoted but still above women. But the delusional bubble gets rudely popped. Most men do not view you with the sexual interest you want them too. How to access attention from that which you desire, where at least 80% reject you?
But as the Other.
The Diva is also the Other because she is a different kind of woman.
Other aligns to Other in fantasy and devotion. Some of it is ..."if only I could be that kind of Other....I'd regain lost social power.".
Some of it is "if I was that then men would/could openly want me."
Some of it is appreciation of talent, spectacle and fantasy.
Some of it is envy.
People rarely think about, by people I mean hetero men (patriarchial delusional) and women (beleaguered by men constantly hitting on them since they were children) , what it must be like to be most women's eunuch neuter safe space and disregarded as less than by other men, who you paradoxically find superficially attractive.
You're left feeling like you're shopping in the remainder bin of Maybe, Kinda, Sorta males who might be closeted enough to be accessors of Manhood Masculine Man-ness.
Ironically, its like the desire for Masculine Men is countered by the Hyper Feminine in the Diva.
Yeah, western ontology and axiology fucks up sexuality internally and from social projection.

Smile, Kyle

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