Showing posts with label porn. Show all posts
Showing posts with label porn. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 18, 2023

As a gay person, are you turned on seeing a person of your own gender having straight sex? by Kyle Phoenix

Of course.

Here's soft porn proof.
Hollywood movie stars.

Rarely are they doing on the screen what you like but you're still turned on enough to see one as attractive and one as not.

In straight porn, like straight people, your attention shifts to that which stimulates more. Howard Stern once pointed out rather adroitly that straight men watching porn are indirectly, subconsciously getting off on the man too.

I once filmed a high school project at the supermarket where Vanessa DelRio shopped. I was filming with my bf but had seen several of her films. Very hot. Because the overall fucking was hot.

I recently watched a whole mish mash of porns for a project and found that I don't care for humiliation or pain porn and that a lot was simulation of pain. But some was nice, erotic. No matter the sex of the participants.

In an effort to distinguish and be pious gay men think they have to be 100% Team Cock or it looks like doubt or confusion. Instead what one can do is take ownership for yourself without regard to any other persons opinion or thought on the shape, form, idea of your crotch and sexuality from day to day.

Vanessa Del Rio? Hell of a sex actress.

Pretty guy and girls or trans having a fun time?
Its all good.

External measurement and quantification of my sexuality and if it should adhere to some mass invisible spectrometer.

Sad.

I will not participate.
I'd rather watch some sexy porn.


#kylePhoenix

#TheKylePhoenixShow

Saturday, October 27, 2018

As a gay person, are you turned on seeing a person of your own gender having straight sex? Answered by Kyle Phoenix






Of course.
Here's soft porn proof.
Hollywood movie stars.
Rarely are they doing on the screen what you like but you're still turned on enough to see one as attractive and one as not.
In straight porn, like straight people, your attention shifts to that which stimulates more. Howard Stern once pointed out rather adroitly that straight men watching porn are indirectly, subconsciously getting off on the man too.
I once filmed a high school project at the supermarket where Vanessa DelRio shopped. I was filming with my bf but had seen several of her films. Very hot. Because the overall fucking was hot.
I recently watched a whole mish mash of porns for a project and found that I don't care for humiliation or pain porn and that a lot was simulation of pain. But some was nice, erotic. No matter the sex of the participants.
In an effort to distinguish and be pious gay men think they have to be 100% Team Cock or it looks like doubt or confusion. Instead what one can do is take ownership for yourself without regard to any other persons opinion or thought on the shape, form, idea of your crotch and sexuality from day to day.
Vanessa DelRio? Hell of a sex actress.
Pretty guy and girls or trans having a fun time?
Its all good.
External measurement and quantification of my sexuality and if it should adhere to some mass invisible spectrometer.
Sad.
I will not participate.
I'd rather watch some sexy porn.

Tuesday, February 20, 2018

Kyle Phoenix Answers: How is real gay sex different from gay porn sex?

Gay sex is often a deep level of incongruity because of how men approach sex without communication. Imagine one guy standing up and screaming stick it in, service me, hold still and the other telling him his favorite color is yellow.
You have to negotiate more in gay sex because both bodies make all potential combinations possible.
Then someone has to slow down and speed up. Some people fuck like you have their cancer meds in a safe or lay back like the King of Siam is ready for his daily blowjob. Gay men also have to negotiate safe sex, hopefully. Which can end the whole show right then and there. The energy and the communication often makes gay men desire relationships, not for what they can give to another human being but for the knowledge of another and someone knowing you. because the communication can be so goobbledygook.
Don’t do that.
No, I don’t like that.
Yeah, I understand English so I understand YOU like that however as my body is involved, I don’t like that.
Do more of that.
Pay attention to me.
This is not a service call.
No, I’m not playing out some degrading porn fantasy just because this is private sex.
Not everyone wants piss on their leg, in their mouth, nor to have ejaculate on their face.
Gay men tend to approach human sex as if they’re in a porn movie. Like a police officer rushing out to work pretending to be Mel Gibson from Lethal Weapon. That won’t work, in any reality but it’s hard for some men to hear that.
I had an ex who liked to bite. Not playful bites but next day in the office, my God how did you get that pussing bruise on your throat, Kyle? I had to tell him stop don’t do that, once. Then twice. The second time included if you do it again I will clock you. He did it a third time. He got clocked. Amazingly with all the degrees in that bed, and he went to Amherst, clocking someone worked. He also wanted to pee on me. I offered he could pee on my leg in the shower. That’s not what he meant. The breakup was inevitable, eh?
I’ve been called nigger. Yeah, nigger, you like that? That feel good, nigger?
That directly goes to Black and Latino porn. I’ve seen White porn, never does someone spontaneously scream yeah, Jew, yeah, dago, take that, you potato!
I had to shutdown the racial verbal assaulter too.
I’ve been——manhandled in a way I’m still not sure if it was deep tissue massage or invasive. I think it was invasive for someone to keep pressing their knuckles into me, my body, all over….but afterwards I felt so relaxed. I was violated…and relaxed. The confusion is why I never saw him again. Though it still stands out.
There was a bottom who was so energetic he nearly snapped my penis in two because he thought that aerobic movement was passion.
Gay men tend to lack skill. Because gay porn lacks skill. It’s so organized to edit (I edit my TV show so I have my own templates and formats) that gay men translate that back to real sex. Think on this, where do gay men, teenagers see gay sex depicted and described? Parents don’t sit their son’s down and explain that when you’re sucking man’s cock, junior you need to be conscious of your teeth. Or when fingering or being fingered or penetrated or rimming, like all of life, there will be some shit, no matter how much you bathe, cleanse, perfume. Sex is messy.
In gay porn, unless it’s messy gay porn, it’s very clean, organized, antiseptic almost, well shaved, pretty bodies most times and everyone is over the moon with blowjobs, giving and receiving, rimming, penetration, etc.. Interestingly enough much of gay porn of people of color includes versatility whereas White porn is very A does B or B does A, very binary positionality.
Threesomes. You gotta talk beforehand. There’s no “flow” because now it’s three people who like this and not that but some of that but not this. And then invariably someone is the focus while someone isn’t and all watchers believe that they aren’t being done as fairly as the one they’re watching getting done. So there’s something akin to jealousy. You might have enough in the oeuvre of penetration A and then intensity of B but B wants you to delight in penetration of him as much as you do A. Trust me, I’ve been C and B got snarky because A and I enjoyed ourselves differently than B and I did. So someone is always rotating out for refreshments or the bathroom because it’s momentary synchronicity not continuous.
Orgies, Group sex are again nothing like porn—-actually I think this is one of the spaces where reality is better than manufactured images because a mass orgy of four or more is generally enough of everything to keep diving into the pool for. A group of six or so is good because then there’s types and differences and such. In porn in an orgy the goal is always to be different, film different so everyone is forced into artificial variety. But in life you can all be doing variants on the same thing and it not be artificial. Well, that’s my experience…..
Gay porn teaches males a simplicity towards a very complicated engagement and often you can feel with partners the disappointment in themselves or you that it’s not like the images. And its not because it’s choreographed so when someone starts to have a choreographed sexual encounter with you , you can feel it. It’s like I can hear people/students who watch too much TV. They talk in rapid bursts of simplistic information but not thought. That’s what porn taught gay sex is like—-NOW 7 minutes for oral sex and YOU have to penetrate me in 3 minutes with a rock hard erection and THEN I’ll ejaculate and you ejaculate within 13 seconds of seeing me.
I’ve often told guys with that intense push, the cookies aren’t burning in the oven and you don’t get a prize for doing this in 18 minutes with all bases covered.
The best sex, unlike porn, lasts hours. Do something, get a refreshment, come back, do some more. Doze. Do some more. There are Native American sex practices where you make love for 24 hours at a time by doing stop starts breaks etc but you never get dressed or leave. Ahh, my fantasy……….
Great porn would I guess pay the actors to keep having sex and then edit that down to like two or three hours, to see the intimacy that develops, the laughter, the confusion, the negotiation. Just lock them in a room for a day, no TV, no phone and give them a general script to hit not such a controlled template.
I don’t think porn is bad but having been with and taught thousands of men, it severely limits men.
Systems Integrationist, writer, teacher, entrepreneur
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Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Is Gay Porn Racist? on the Kyle Phoenix Blog

Is there racism at the heart of gay pornography? Are depictions of black and Asian men exploiting prejudices about them?
01 OCTOBER 2013 | BY MATT PHIL CARVER

Photo by Blatino Erotica Awards.


Pornography and its alleged harmfulness has been a burning issue in politics and the media throughout 2013. British Prime Minister David Cameron wants porn-filters, scientists want to know what porn does to our brains and the city of Los Angeles wants its porn performers to wear condoms at all times.

When it comes to gay porn though, there is plenty of discussion in academia but barely any in the media.

So let’s get started.

Gail Dines is the author of Pornland: How Porn has Hijacked our Society; she is a professor in sociology and a founder member of the activist group Stop Porn Culture. She is the perfect person to tell us whether these ample sociological debates over pornography are inclusive of gay porn and, if so, what the pressing issues are.

Dines proves to be very enthusiastic to discuss the matter.

‘The fight has always been between women and straight porn,’ she says. ‘I think that gay men have not got into this, and if they have, they’ve sided with the pro-porn feminists.’

Dines has plenty of questions about the gay porn industry but the one she speaks most animatedly about is the issue of racial stereotyping.

‘When I was researching my book on gay porn I was shocked at the level of racism,’ she says. ‘A lot of gay porn is racist in the way it hyper-masculinizes black men and feminizes Asian men.

‘Asian men are always turned into “twinks” and “fuckees”, while the black men are always the “fuckers” of as many men as they can lay their hands on – especially white men.

‘In this country [the USA], racism has always been sexualized. The idea is that black women are whores and black men are animalistic “fuckers” who are after white women.

‘That’s the history of racism in America – black people were defined out of humanness into animalistic sexuality and that’s what was legitimizing the lynching of black men and the raping of black women.

‘It swirls around the culture – those racist, sexist stereotypes are in this [American] culture – so when they come to produce porn, it’s just sexualizing the stereotypes of black and Asian men.’

This is just one topic GSN discussed with Gail Dines, others will be covered in a later feature, but endemic racism is such a strong allegation to make against the gay porn industry it merits seeking a case for the defense here and now.

Mike Stabile and Jack Judah Shamama run Gay Porn Blog, a popular website for blogs, videos, news and discussion of all things within the gay porn industry. They say they have been ‘blogging about gay porn since there was an internet with porn to blog about’, so they know the industry as well as anyone.

Stabile and Shamama prove to be very approachable and provide firm responses to Dines’ views on racism in porn.

Stabile says: ‘Yes, porn has strains of racism. But so do politics, so does larger culture.

‘Where porn differs is that it offers tremendously varied versions of gay life; there are Asian tops and plenty of black bottoms. Part of the excitement about the internet is that you can see your body, and your sexuality, represented without limits.

‘So yes, if you’re looking for racism, you’ll find it – that’s what free speech is about. Sometimes it’s ugly, but it’s wrong to paint with too broad a brush.

Shamama adds: ‘When people start to talk about porn (especially gay porn) in the context of social responsibility I tend to get nervous because if you follow their arguments out to their logical conclusions they always seems to end up advocating for censorship, whether they mean to or not.

‘You can take any creative medium – modern art, rap music – and cherry pick racist or sexist examples (especially when you take them out of context) and easily apply that to the medium as a whole.’

So is gay porn fundamentally racist, as Gail Dines says? Or are videos featuring Asian ‘twinks’ and black ‘fuckers’ just one sub-category in a pluralistic industry that seeks to cater for all tastes?

GSN took to some gay porn forums to garner the opinions of the consumers themselves.

On the forums of gay porn site Just Us Boys, user ‘Agromac’ told us: ‘So long as you bear in mind what porn is then you’re alright – it’s entertainment, fantasy. If you start thinking it’s more than that, like a reality for which to strive, then you’re in trouble.

‘If porn does have any kind of stereotypes, then there has to be a market for it, but then that’s where the fantasy comes in – bear in mind it's not reality.’

User ‘ElmosToe’ said: ‘The racial stereotypes found in porn exist because they exist in society first. Porn can be harmful in the sense it merely perpetuates those stereotypes and can contribute to a lack of respect towards others by the viewer.

‘Personally, I think some people can tend to, unintentionally, turn what they don’t understand and may fear into a fetish as a way to explore and understand their curiosity.

‘An example of this would be the myth that black men have bigger dicks. This took root several centuries back, starting in Europe and eventually carrying over to the US. The idea of “sexual threat”, that black men in particular were sub-human, animalistic and lust-driven.’

Also among these responses were several negative reactions to the idea of academics being vocal about gay porn.

‘PAbear’, for example, said: ‘They need to get a grip. It’s not about making societal commentary, it’s about getting your dick hard and then getting off.

‘Remember, porn is a tool. It’s a tool for the makers to make money and it’s a tool for the viewers to get off. We’ve got to stop making it the be-all-and-end-all of society.’

This skepticism for academic criticism echoes a comment from Stabile of Gay Porn Blog: ‘At the end of the day, Ms Dines doesn’t like sexuality. She's called for Playboy to be banned and for BDSM images to be outlawed.

‘Sexuality may not be a big part of her life, but it’s a big part of the lives of a lot of people – men, women, gay, straight, black, white, Asian. And for those of us who do like porn, and don’t see sexuality as a negative, we don’t want to be told that what we’re looking at is wrong or shameful.’

There seems to be a general acceptance on both sides of this debate that racial stereotypes do indeed exist in gay porn, but are they present in ‘a lot of it’, as Gail Dines says, or in ‘cherry-picked examples’ as Jack Judah Shamama says?

One repeated suggestion is that, in porn, racial stereotypes only exist only as a reflection of the society they are created for; that if there were no demand then there would be no supply.

If, by this logic, the accusations of racism were turned from the creators of gay porn onto the consumers of gay porn, surely the same questions would still apply; is it endemic or is it isolated examples? Is it just harmless sexual fantasy that has no decisive influence on society, or something more sinister?

If we are to separate porn consumers from the visual porn industry itself, then it is worth looking to the written erotica industry.

The publishing industry for gay erotica is very precise in its targeting of specific reader preferences and caters largely (although certainly not exactly) to the same consumers as gay visual porn.

Make Mine to Go author Dilo Keith (a professional pseudonym) writes gay erotica that is fuelled by a lifetime’s immersion in gay culture and by her own experiences in BDSM culture.

A self-described ‘queer female’, Keith says she is an avid reader of written gay fiction, but only an occasional watcher of gay porn; so she knows the audience well, but is neither an avid consumer nor a critic of visual gay porn itself.

She is the closest we are likely to get to an informed but impartial opinion.

‘My experience [with gay porn videos] is mostly from what I see posted on sites like this [Just Us Boys forums],’ Keith tells us. ‘Men, more than women, tend to get turned on by very specific things, including race. I don’t think gay and non-gay men differ all that much.

‘I don’t get the sense there’s a huge amount of racial inequality depicted, not more than any other element.

‘Like most porn, it can perpetuate stereotypes, encourage turning people into fetish objects and so on. But non-porn media does the same thing by creating unrealistic standards for beauty or success or whatever.

‘For most men, racial preferences probably don’t cause a problem in real life – it’s just what they want to watch. I’d rather not encourage more racially-based porn, but I’m not going to support regulating something there’s a market for if it involves consenting adults who do no actual harm as a result of it.’

Whether or not this is correct, that there is ‘no actual harm’ as a result of racial stereotyping in gay porn, is a matter of each individual’s moral opinion.

Likewise, whether or not gay porn is a ripe subject matter for academic debate is open to question.

But while pornography at large is being hotly debated in politics and the media, and with gay porn being largely ignored in both arenas, the most important thing is to ask the questions.

- See more at: http://www.gaystarnews.com/article/gay-porn-racist011013#sthash.T2gdvBPy.dpuf