Sexuality: Anal Sex Positions

Anal Sex Positions

Most genital sex positions can be adapted anally, whether the participants are male, female, or transgendered especially from behind, although some with difficulty because of the different angles for anal versus vaginal entry. Also vaginal masturbatory positions, such as fingering or fisting, can be adapted anally by males and females.



Missionary anal: The receptive partner lies on his or her back. In order to achieve optimal alignment, the receptive partner's legs should be in the air with the knees drawn towards the chest. Some sort of support (such as a pillow) under the receptive partner's hips might also be useful. The penetrative partner positions him/herself between the receptive partner's legs. This position is often cited as good for beginners, because it allows them to relax more fully than is usual in the doggy position.

Doggy style: The receptive partner is either on all fours, or lies on his or her stomach. The penetrative partner approaches and penetrates from the rear. This position maximizes the depth of penetration, which may be desirable by either or both partners, but can pose the risk of pushing against the sigmoid colon. If the receptive partner is male, this position increases the chances of stimulating the prostate. This position makes easier a more vigorous thrusting action. A variation is the leapfrog position, in which the receptive partner angles the torso downward, with the face resting on (for example) a pillow. 

Another "rear entry" position involves the receptive partner lying flat and face down, with the penetrative partner straddling the thighs of the receiving partner. This can produce sensations different from the doggy position above.
Spooning: The partners lie on their sides facing the same direction. This allows the receptive partner to greatly control initial entry and the depth, speed and force of subsequent thrusting.


Cowboy/cowgirl or reverse cowboy/cowgirl: In these positions the receptive partner is on top of and straddling the penetrative partner either facing the penetrative partner or facing away ("reverse") from the penetrative partner. This is a great beginning position, as this position allows the receptive partner more control over the depth, rhythm and speed of penetration. More specifically, the receptive partner can slowly push his/her anus down on the penis, allowing time for the anus muscles to relax around the penis before the receiving partner decides to start riding up and down on the penis.

Pick-up – Done on bed for greater intimacy, but can also be done standing up. With the receiving partner on her or his back and the penetrating partner on his knees, the penetrating partner puts the receiving partner's legs on top of his shoulders. The penetrating partner leans in to kiss while inserting his penis into receiving partner's anus. The penetrating partner then wraps arms underneath the receiving partner, lifts the receiving partner off the bed while leaning back for balance. The receiving partner masturbates with one hand while wrapping the other hand around the penetrating partner's shoulders. The penetrating partner is supporting almost the entire weight of the receiving partner's body, and moves the body up and down on top of his penis until ejaculation. 

Lean back and let him ride – Done on bed. The penetrating partner lounges on bed, puts arms behind him, so that torso is raised off the bed. The receiving partner then squats/lowers himself or herself onto the penis of the penetrating partner. The receiving partner, or rider, then lays down on the bed with the penetrating partner's penis still inside his or her anus and bends the knees, placing feet on each side of the penetrating partner's waist. The rider then uses his or her legs to buck the ass up and down on top of the penetrating partner's penis, while the shoulders and upper back are still resting on the bed. The penetrating partner lounges back and watches while the rider masturbates and squirms/bucks on top of the penetrating partner's penis. 

Cowboy and horse – Done on floor, bed, backyard lawn or the open plains. Also, good for big receiving partners and smaller penetrating partners. The receiving partner gets down on his hands and feet (not knees) and sticks ass into air with his knees bent. Penetrating partner inserts penis into receiving partner's ass and then leans chest down over the back of the receiving partner, wrapping one arm around receiving partner's chest and grabbing the receiving partner's penis with the other hand. The receiving partner then straightens knees and lifts ass into air while the penetrating partner still inside is lifted up as well. Performed best if penetrating partner can wrap left leg around left leg of receiving partner, and similarly with the right leg -- in this way the receiving partner is completely holding up the weight of the penetrating partner and can buck around like a horse while the penetrating partner masturbates the receiving partner. 

Cradle – Done in chair, or couch. The penetrating partner sits on couch and the receiving partner sits horizontally in the lap of the penetrating partner. The penetrating partner inserts penis into anus of the receiving partner while he wraps one arm around the shoulders/back of the receiving partner and the other arm around the knees/legs, and picks up receiving partner to craddle him or her. The receiving partner masturbates while the penetrating partner rocks the receiving partner back/forth and up/down on top of his penis. 

The dancing dolphin – Done in a spa or swimming pool. The penetrating partner seats him or herself on spa/pool step, so that lower back is arched yet firm. The receiving partner then slowly sits herself or himself onto the penis/strap-on of the penetrating partner. The receiving partner then swivels in the water with the penetrating partner's penis/strap-on still deep inside her or his anus; using the spa/pool water to aid in anal lubrication and cooling. The penetrator then slides off the step to thrust the anal probe deep into his/her partners ass, while the receiving partner treads water and masturbates.

Thank you, I look forward to your emails and comments. And as always check your local listings for The Kyle Phoenix Show broadcast times in NYC. You can always find more information about me, topics and tips on relationships, finance and life strategies on http://kylephoenixsite.com

Short Story from Escapades: The Eiffel Tower

The Eiffel Tower

by Kyle Phoenix

Annie was a good girl.

Annie snuck into her mother's room and stole ten dollars.

Annie took a pencil from the teacher's pocketbook during recess.

Annie took a young man's heart in Rome and gave it a giggle.

Annie strangled the life out of a when she was 10.

Annie shot a gun when she was 14.

Annie considered suicide when she was 5.

Annie started taking little yellow pills when she was 9.

Annie loved.

Annie would laugh when her boyfriend dropped his trousers.

Annie smelled like lilacs and onions.

Annie bit clean through her lip when she stole someone's son.

Annie stole a Spaniard's virginity when she was 17.

Annie stole the class flag and burned it after school.

Annie stole a look at her baby before she sold it.

Annie colored her hair red when she worked the night shift.

Annie licked with a goose bumped tongue and sucked with a sigh.

Annie took a bath in her clothes.

Annie never wore knickers.

Annie watched it from her window across the street.

Annie decided to steal the Eiffel Tower.

Annie took a bubble bath with pants on.

Annie stole the Eiffel Tower from Hallmark at the age of 37 in regret of her life's unknown possibilities.

Annie cried herself to sleep every night.

Annie wanted to go.

Annie died two days ago.

Annie asked her husband why his organ was so small.

Annie regretted every moment of her life.

Annie debated killing herself then decided to wait until her mother died.

Annie sat in the middle of Batavia, children at her heels, husband around her finger, Eiffel Tower in her pocket, dog the backseat, sex in the past tense, debt swimming onto her shore, breasts having grown and dipped before her eyes, trees lines around her legs and stomach, pity in everyman's eye, and she knew. 

She knew. 

She would never go to the Eiffel Tower with fresh love in her heart and hair that flowed freely.

And that's what killed Annie.

Thank you, I look forward to your emails and comments. And as always check your local listings for The Kyle Phoenix Show broadcast times in NYC. You can always find more information about me, topics and tips on relationships, finance and life strategies on http://kylephoenixsite.com

Short Story from Escapades: I Awaken

                                           

  I Awaken

by Kyle Phoenix

(originally published 1993,1995 and 1996 and part of the Escapades compilation by Mr. Doyle)

          My eyes are closed.  I awaken.  I lay for a second, still, trapped in a dream.  I patiently await to wake but I am already.  My mind searches for what is missing.  My sex.  I let my hand slide under the covers and am stopped by my body as it betrays me.  I reach farther and what allowed others to see me is gone.  I touch farther, no longer my sex a direction but now a depth.  My fear is enraptured by my joyful thirst for knowledge.

          I reach deeper until I am lost within myself.  I am shocked and laughing and angry and darkly pleasured.

          My hand is engulfed by another tool for life, deeper within my depth, life's possibilities.

          I stand differently.  Muscles that were once a thought away are now miles beyond my mind's reach.  I hurt.  I hurt because I'm trying to command the past.

          I look.  I stare.  I touch.  I hold my new self with both hands and find a new tenderness, a new wholeness.  What I felt minutes ago was missing is now found but it isn't what I lost.

          I smell different.  With my musk, it's strength is gone.  It's still strong but sleek, linear, far more subtle.  I am now sublime in my bodies perfume.

          I dress differently.  I am freed out of slacks...but I am endangered in that freedom.

          I walk with eyes on me.  I never noticed how many eyes there are.  Now I am a thing.  I am where my sweater rises and my skirt dips.  Where the seams of my pants tighten.  Now I am a mystery and when I am not, I am a stereotype.  I am a competitor when I thought I was a compliment.  A synergy of the inimical.

          I talk and am not heard.  When they do hear, I am wrong.  Dismissed.  What was once expected that I refine and focus in the past I am now excluded for.  Others try and determine my "no's" and "yeses".

          I earn but there is so much they demand I acquiesce for my earnings.  I must wear that.  I must believe or perpetuate a lie about age.  I must propagandize what is not my weakness.  I must not call wrong wrong or right right.

          I love.  But again I must give fiercely, totally, individually.  That is my place.  My role.  He has his choice.  I am their choices.

          I tear and there is agony.

          " My son, " he says.

          And I hate both with all of this love.  Am I just a go-between, a vessel, a tunnel for one man to come into and another to come out of ?

          I love them with this hatred, with this agony, this depth, this tool, this exclusion, this selling, this right right, this wrong wrong, this soft, this strong, this lack of direction.

          With my eyes open, I awaken.


Thank you, I look forward to your emails and comments. And as always check your local listings for The Kyle Phoenix Show broadcast times in NYC. You can always find more information about me, topics and tips on relationships, finance and life strategies on http://kylephoenixsite.com

OWN: The Oprah Winfrey Network and Its Strategic Future, Part 1

I've spent some time not only watching Oprah but more importantly studying her and to some degree integrating her into my teaching as one of the business examples. It even has lead me to start an online show and a cable TV show---looking at the model of Harpo and design of the multiple shows that have come out of that company. The problem with OWN is our perception of Oprah's success from Harpo. It took 4 to 6 years starting from the early 80's to syndication time to actually completely own the Oprah Winfrey Show. It then took another, 3 to 5 years for TV movies, almost 15 years for a feature film and then a magazine deal with Hearst, 8 years before Dr. Phil, 20 years for Rachael Ray, Dr. Oz and Nate Berkus to be spawned. 25 years for OWN. Along with a timeline, this suggests that time is Harpo's greatest strength and where it's advantage is best seen. So now we're looking at Year 2 of OWN. However the platform of cable in a universe based analogy and Discovery as a galaxy, its a greater opportunity than a disadvantage. There's literally more space and time to expand and explore. OWN will not be Oprah. She'll be the vanguard, the spear, the vision but ultimately in a twenty-year perspective, she cannot be the absolute content. One of the best models is the Fox Network and that it took 5 years to find it's legs and 10 years to become a real player and 20 to become true competition.

Oprah on The Rachael Ray Show,
partially owned and distributed by Harpo

The advantage Discovery creates is that it's worldwide, that it's 7 channels---that gives a range of over 1 billion around the world. Now at the peak, Oprah was rocking 12 to 15 million viewers---to multiply that success over multiple shows/formats is going to take time. She's arguably one of the most famous women in America but not the world. She's playing in a new market. She had on her show a young Chinese, Chen Lu Yu, a woman who has a viewership of 200 million a week in China, while Oprah was doing 40 million a week including America and international markets.

Chen Lu Yu of China
(on a set that looks a lot like the Oprah WInfrey Show)

She and Rosie (who was subsequently canceled, Iyanla Vanzant is the new hit show so far) are tent poles to a huge tent. If they're playing conservatively to cross-channel programming through the Discovery 7 then they're aiming for 150 to 200 million total viewership a week from the singular OWN channel.

Harpo has just inked a deal with HBO, Dr. Phil is repeated on OWN, the Oprah Show (no longer under it's one year contractual restrictions with Cap Cities) is now rebroadcast, finally Suze Orman is doing a show, Chaz Bono/Cher, Tyler Perry, Lisa Ling and all of the celebrity guests on Master Class plus rotating feature films.

Like Fox it will take a Simpsons, a Married with Children, American Idol---along with the Fox model; it will take a Sex In The City, The Wire, deep documentaries ala HBO but those shows that helped to tentpole a network require time.

Oprah with Dr. O Nate Berkus,
Dr Phil and Sue Orman, all of their shows
partially owned and distributed by Harpo

We can't review OWN in these first few years for long-term success. We have to see it in increments of 1,3,5,10, 15 and 20 years. Oprah has always played the long game----holding her show on the air until Harpo was self-supporting beyond just her daytime show, expanding into multiple forms of media to literally create its own engine of production in TV, print, cable, publishing (those O magazines compiled books), radio, public showcases, and relationships.

OWN Year 3---they'll have a handful of mini, mid and 1 or 2 large tent poles for the network.

OWN Year 5---there will be at least 3 to 5 large tent poles as the minis and mids provide enough survival time to grow the big ones.

OWN Year 10---a fuller network that is a hybrid of HBO/OWN--its no coincidence that they're in partnership to learn how to do what HBO has done in 20 years. Not the route of the former MTV President.

Because we have to consider what is AFTER reality television? That's Oprah's long-term ability, the capacity to consider the field, the long-term strategy and play hold 'em and build 'em, while maintaining full control and ownership. Not many businesses/owners have the gravitas to play such a long-range game but what the real investment in Oprah by Discovery is, is that she is platinum branded to keep sponsors with her long-term no matter the choppy seas and the ability to mass millions of people to follow.

Now she's traveling to India and other places in the world, becoming International Oprah---I think she's going to do something unique to Americans---bring them the world through their trusted cipher.

Thank you,

The Kyle Phoenix Show 

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Kyle Phoenix

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(This blog was originally in answer to a commentary system on Forbes.com (http://www.forbes.com/sites/jennagoudreau/2011/10/06/oprah-winfrey-and-discovery-hit-the-reset-button-on-own/Oprah) concerning The OWN Network and some responses ideas etc. there.)

The Last Seduction, DVD Review

I can't say enough about this film.
It is my favorite. It's such a favorite film of mine that when I came to New York and didn't have a "drink" when going to bars, I ordered a Manhattan like Bridgette and to this day I still drink it.

 What makes this film so good to me is one, she's smart and two she doesn't pull back. It would've been easy to have her chicken out and go good girl at the end. But Bridgette  has her eyes on the prize from beginning to end. Whether you consider her the Devil or a tarnished angel she doesn't stop.
Also she thinks.
It’s so wonderful to see someone sit down and have to figure out a problem, to have to plot a manipulation, to leap at opportunities that may mean nothing and MAKE them mean something.
I like the fact that she plays every card in the deck: sex, homophobia, lust, and race, anything it takes to in a sense stay alive.

Now this may seem like a thoroughly evil person but there points in this film where Bridgette  does "crack" or try to really be herself. There's the one where Mike asks who she is, what she's doing and she tries to explain to him about her husband and the money while playing pool. He doesn't take her seriously. For two reasons, he doesn't think she's that smart or capable and he can't fathom himself doing it either. One thing I've learned is that the smarter you see yourself. The more capable you feel about yourself the easier it is to understand others even if their goals and methods are opposed to your own. It takes smarts to see smarts.

There's also the point where Bridgette  has been forced to fake the accident with the private investigator. Before she leaves and is caught, she tries to have Mike comfort her, to really listen to her. But two things have happened. She's played the game so well that her sincerity comes across as false and two; he doesn't want someone without secrets. Who doesn't have the upper hand? Some people are drawn to being destroyed by others because it validates their existence. If someone would take the time to destroy you it means that you exist, that you have meaning. But Bridget does crack here, she's ready to fess up and be with Mike as an equal and he blows her off to play hockey. Her voice even cracks and in some ways we can see how Bridgette  is the way she is because no one is a race horse like she is. That she is tougher because the disappointment of others has made her tough to begin with. That honest emotion I can relate to and it's why I like Bridgette   If she was just uncaringly evil, she'd be no fun but you understand why Bridgette  is the way she is if you look at when she lets her defenses down.

Above all else she is the consummate chess player, understanding that the game is never to the pieces your playing with but to destroying the other side. Being cut off from running because of her husband's debts and her desire NOT to run has boxed her in into not so much fighting in the way that men or women perceive fighting but the way thinkers do. A thinker knows that everything and everybody is a weapon or a defense in a fight. That each word is a calculation, that each action should mean or be about something and seeing that ability on screen is what makes this film on my top 3 favorite films of my entire life.

And I've seen tooooooooooooo many movies to say that lightly. Another film on that short list is Fresh.


Thank you for reading,
Kyle Phoenix
Email: kylephoenixshow@aol.com
Website: http://kylephoenixsite.com/
Blog: http://kylephoenixshow.blogspot.com/2012
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Are Strippers, Porn Stars, Lap Dancers, Escorts Exploited?: Black, White, Puerto Rican---Is Everyone Justa Freakin'?

Here in the big bad ( and badddd) city of NYC the trend has gone from bars, lounges and dance clubs to the push to be more...attractive. Attractive to a greater clientele and sometimes a younger and older clientele. The clothes have come off. Throughout the city, all five boroughs the clothes have come off----male and female. Now whether that's right or wrong I'm not going to morally go at but what I am going to look at is the question/statement that runs through my head when I'm in clubs watching people do this:

"If he/she knew Microsoft Office Word they wouldn't be doing this"

I teach at a university and a variety of other projects around the city, particularly focusing on adult education so a lot of my students/mentees are in their 20s and early 30s. This tends to be the most trying, difficult time of a younger persons life as they are (hopefully) advancing their education but still need to work and support themselves. Younger people may be more appearance driven so they tend to be a larger demographic of those who work out, their metabolisms are faster so they tend not to be as out of shape and most importantly they are still developing their moral, social and self esteem cores. All of these factors make them available to using what they have, shaking their moneymakers, swinging on the pole for all they're worth. Which I would defend they have a right to do with their bodies as they will, when legally over the age of 18.

However, does it work out? And frighteningly enough, are the more exploited Black and Latino?

Dancer: 80% or More Under Educated

The potential progression looks like this: you need to make some extra cash. You're reasonably cute: You're willing to be near to total nude and will allow varying degrees of touching to occur upon your body for money. You do a little dance, make a little noise and get down one night. You walk out with a fist full of dollars for a few hours work and that's intoxicating to anyone, particularly to someone who might be in a financial bind. You go back. A one time lark turns into a scheduled work assignment, the money is initially good. However the very nature of any capitalistic project/business is that the Demand will change the Supply to not only be present but also innovate and have some sort of variety. The Dancer (male or female, I want to be fair about this) has then to innovate their act/their appearance or farm themselves out to more clubs or take what they can get. The problem with all of these alternatives is that it requires a level of sophisticated innovative thinking. And politely speaking, the innovators are the smallest percentage of the Dancers, as the innovators would naturally graduate to bigger and better things. The business is therefore full of predominantly, 80% or higher, under educated Work Horses. Logically speaking the more educated you are the less forms of degradation/exploitation you will put up with as you have the capacity to discern exploitation and make a plan or a stand to remove yourself from it in a shorter span of time.  The ones left behind need to eat/survive.

Dancer Becomes an Escort

Now your Work Horses have less options. They tend to not have an advanced or complete basic education (GED/high school degree) so they have learned perhaps survival skills but not critical thinking and divergent thinking that allows for innovation. But the money is still good. Somewhere in here the two other options come in---Porn or Escorting. Which comes first depends on the individual. Someone tips you $20 or more consistently and they're nice to you, they're reasonably attractive, they offer money for a private lap dance, they offer more money for a "date" and boom you're an "Escort". (Note: I'm using the term Escort purposefully rather than prostitute as a prostitute may be picked up in random spots in public and an escort is making a "date" appointment. You might think the discernment is silly but those who do this work are very specific. Also escorts tend to be paid more.) As an Escort you're being paid $200 or more an hour, comparable or even more than stripping/dancing and perhaps you're young enough or needy enough or intoxicated enough to need the money, to enjoy the sex, to want the intimacy, to actually like your date.


Dancer Becomes Porn Star

Going from a Work Horse dancer to Pornography is similar to becoming an Escort except that maybe the date is to bring you into a company/camp where you'll be part of scene or two (average pay is $200 to 500 a scene). Again you're in the bind of perhaps liking it, needing the money, making an assured amount instead of the maybe amount as a dancer (maybe the patronage will like you and tip you the equivalent). The contracts that Porn stars must sign in order to get paid and the conditions which they live/work under will shock you! No, really, it will ruin how you might view your favorite porn.

Exploitation and Risk

Under-educated men and women have nothing but their bodies to offer in exchange for survival. They are controlled by several multi-billion dollar industries/vehicles that in no way give revenue back on their talent (Bars, Porn/Video companies, Dates/Johns). And what we must throw in to the mix is that all industries, particularly in Western civilization, are influenced by racism and misogyny and to some degree misandry---so the Black & Latino people, male and female in this are often paid less and asked/demanded to do more. For instance being in pornography scenes that are mandatory bare-backing (non-condom) sex scenes.

Facts and Figures

---Black/African American and Hispanic/Latino communities have been disproportionately affected by HIV and AIDS in America.

---In 2009 the highest percentage of new HIV diagnoses were among those aged 40-44 years.

---The U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) publish HIV statistics for 40 states and 5 dependent areas with confidential name-based HIV infection reporting. AIDS statistics include all 50 states and the District of Columbia, as well as the 5 dependent areas.

---Blacks/African Americans accounted for half of all new HIV diagnoses and just under half of new AIDS diagnoses in 2009. Of the total number of people living with an HIV diagnosis in 2008 in the 40 U.S. states and 5 dependent areas, 46% were black/African American; 31.6% white; 20% Hispanic/Latino; 1.3% multiple races; 0.6% Asian; 0.4% American Indian/Alaska Native; and 0.04% Native Hawaiian/Other Pacific Islander.

---Among men diagnosed with AIDS in 2009, 56% of black/African American men, 65% of Hispanic/Latino men and 79% of white men became infected with HIV through male-to-male sexual contact. Among women diagnosed with AIDS in 2009, 78% of black/African American women, 75% of Hispanic/Latino women and 68% of white women became infected through heterosexual contact.


Back to Basics:

We can see from above statistics the impact, the devastating impact and so this leads me back to my question: "If he/she knew Microsoft Office Word they wouldn't be doing this"

We'll tackle that in Part 2 of this article.



Thank you, I look forward to your emails and comments. And as always check your local listings for The Kyle Phoenix Show broadcast times in NYC. You can always find more information about me, topics and tips on relationships, finance and life strategies on http://kylephoenixsite.com/

The Dead Zone DVD, review by Kyle Phoenix

This is one of my favorite movies and Christopher Walken struck me as both eerie and sad in this film long before I knew who he even was. What’s handled nicely here is the responsibility of precognitive dreams. It could've simply been about him seeing things and doing something but this makes them more complex than that as it works to deal with the ramifications of all of this ability. In someway this is about the web that permeates from our lives to that of others and how we're only a few people away from destruction, how we're linked to darkness in ways we don't even suspect. I think that this and the Shining take the best look into someone having an odd ability and the personal price that wrought. What’s nice about Stephen King's concept is that it pretty much came off here. Perhaps what works best in his films is the lack of special effects. To try and produce them with tends to disrupt the flow of the movie. Here Walken's acting and Brooke Adams make a tragic couple whose lives were interrupted for a number of years by his coma but ultimately their love is the sacrifice to save the world from Martin Sheen. Perhaps the message intended or not is to look at our lives as part of a bigger landscape than just what we want.