But why would you? It is not your present state that is the issue, it is your perception and judgment of it.
Your role right now is to be insecure and self conscious. That is natural. Breathe that. Go outside, sit with a tree and just accept your nowness. Now look at the tree. It has accepted it's nowness.
You have been an adult human for maybe a handful of years. Your body isn't even set until about 27.
Now see your self from that perspective. You ain't even a loaf of baked human bread for another four years.
And then once baked into bread you will be tasked to take on kind of bread, taste, shape, coloring before you even get to additives!
And then you'll be able to see the inverted, circular truth of human existence. We keep re-experiencing our own evolution. You will be insecure and self conscious at 33 and yes 43 and then 53 and at 63 and 73 and 83 and 93 and at 103.
But get this, you're alive at a point in human history where you'll live much longer than your ancestors, probably with good health to 103. You have 80 years to Become.
What will you become?
An evolving human who learns to deal with those feelings, that they are natural and pass. That we learn with time and patience to manage that constant anxiety, some much better than others because of how we focus on it.
Right now you lack, as we all have perceptual time reference to reach back into your self management tools to pull out your insecurity wrench and give the screw a tightening. Time teaches you hold to build a wrench suitable to every situation, no matter how extraordinary you will encounter. Even a zombie apocalypse. Lol
The way you build a wrench faster is you build an inner tool shed. Read voraciously but focus on first the lives of others, biographies. Fiction is fun but it's aim is to raise anxiety. Ground first in seeing people for they with lend you their tools. Then read about the world. One of the things I realized at your age was that I generally but didn't specifically understand what electricity wad, how it worked, was harnessed so I bought children's how does it work books and now I notice I can basically understand most things in looking at, trains, buses, machines, factories, airplanes, biology, genetics, psychology.
I possess the trained faculty to focus my conscious at something, anything, even my consciousness itself and glean understanding.
Saves a whole lot of bullshit anxiety. I then have perception time reference to experiences of my own and others, tools, we call it the past to reapply to this constantly repeating reality matrix.
I have used the "wisdom" of others who have been similar to "me" long before me to master being me.
It's like pedaling a bike. We just don't acknowledge that what we're really doing is repetition of pedaling thousands, millions of times while adjusting balance and navigation.
And then you "die" and you get to do it again as a different form of conscious. Again. But by then you'll have passed, moved through, not triumphed the Life class.
The life goal is mastery of pedaling----movement, motivation, energy with balance---control and navigation ---intention to get to new points that require pedaling, balance and navigational experience ---rocks, bumps, hills, etc.---at a variable.
Boom.
Existence.
Existence.
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